a most interesting encounter

I hesitate to blog this one because I know there are a few grandmas and grandpas who check into it every once in a while. (So if you are Grandma Terrie or Grandma Rolyne, please turn back now) I will continue, though, because too many of you have heard the stories of my nemesis, and this one is too good to ignore. A brief description, for those of you not aquainted with her, might go like this:

Imagine the most white trash person you've every met. Wait, think garbage lady, double her size and crank the profanity up to a 100, and there you have the bane of my existence. We'll call her Sammy from 111. You'll probably think this is all rediculously overdramatic, but we're talking about a girl whose husband was arrested at our apartment complex by 15 cops with guns drawn and a helicopter overhead. He then returned to serve house arrest at our building. A few weeks ago she turned her fithy orfice on her 5 year old and it was so appalling I called child protective services. She has probably 3 different medical malpractice lawsuits going against 3 different doctors right now and lives on disability with her grandmother who pays the rent from her retirement funds. She's a class act.

So yesterday our maintenance guy, Matt (we like Matt, he's one of the good guys) went in to repair something for Sammy's grandma and came out 15 minutes later looking very grossed out. He told me that after he spent 5 minutes fixing a knob in the kitchen the grandma took him down the hall to the back room so he could help her with a window that was stuck. As they walked down the hall they passed a bathroom on the left. He briefly looked in the bathroom saw Sammy sitting on the toilet with her pants down to her ankles WITH THE DOOR OPEN. If that's not disturbing enough she says to him, "I guess it's a good thing I wasn't wiping my a** when you walked by."

ha ha ha, It's a visual that will haunt me for years and Matt will probably need therapy.